Your Breakup Was For a Good Reason - Why Is It So Hard?

By Shoshana Jackson

Don't listen to your negative mind chatter about the future.

There are some relationships that will never work, some couples that should not be together.

When you leave one of these relationships for a good reason, you’d think you would gladly accept your breakup and move on.

However, that doesn’t always happen, and you’ll wonder if your break up was for a good reason, why is it so hard to let go?

There are two main reasons you’re finding it hard to let go and move on:


1. Your Emotional Attachment to Your Ex
Even if your breakup was for a good reason, at some point you had to believe that your relationship would work. During that time you formed a bond with your partner. Your emotional attachment to him, is one of the reasons you may have a hard time moving on after your break up.

Your emotional attachment does not end when you break up. You need to learn how to let go of this attachment in order to move on. In order to move on to a healthy relationship with someone new, you’re going to need to let go of all of the feelings and emotions you have tied up in this relationship including any anger, disappointment and guilt.

2. Fear of Your Future Relationships

You ended this relationship for a good reason, now you may feel that your next relationship will be the same. It takes two people to create a healthy relationship and two to maintain an unhealthy one. You need to ask yourself if you will allow yourself to be in another relationship like the one you just left.

As you go through the stages of a break up, you’ll need to set  boundaries to protect yourself from any future toxic relationship. When you’ve healed you’ll feel differently about your future. Starting to date again will be difficult and stressful, but the end result can be a successful and healthy relationship with someone who loves and respects you. Don’t let your fear of the future drive you back to your ex.

Get excited about your future. You have many new experiences awaiting you in the new life you’ll have after you heal from your breakup. Don’t think your thought process will change overnight. It may take a few weeks before your mind will adjust to your new positive thinking. However eventually you won’t need to as “Why is it so hard?” because by then it will be much easier.

Comment/Discussion Question: Have you ever had to breakup for a good reason, but still thought about going back to your ex? Are you going through a breakup with someone who wasn’t right for you, why is it so hard for you to let go. Leave a comment below.



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